Book Club | The Mastery of Love and The Four Agreements
This is the first book club blog where I have done a two for one special. Both 'The Mastery of Love' and 'The Four Agreements' are written by Don Miguel Ruiz and I'm not even going to pretend that I didn't buy them because my YouTube idol Kalyn Nicolson recommended them.
In saying that, Kalyn, whilst she has introduced me to many a great read e.g. 'You are a Badass' and 'Girlboss' can be a tad on the 'unusual' side, so I should have anticipated this prior to buying both of these new books. In addition, buying them from a hippy shop in Bellingen should have also been a giveaway that the contents of these reads is going to be slightly more spiritual and in some instances...downright weird!
Let me elaborate...
When reading both books by Ruiz, you will need to become used to him referring to life (or at least what we know as life as 'the dream') there will also be some casual use of the word 'hell' and to be completely honest, it makes it hard to follow what he's saying at times. I think the jist of the 'dream' is that we live in a reality that is entirely concocted within our minds, it is our own 'dream' because we are not looking at life or the world around us objectively, but rather, have been heavily influenced, often negatively, by the beliefs of our parents.
Now, while there are some great ideas within both books, it would be a hell of a lot easier to understand and more enjoyable to read if he used plain language.
If you do want to check out either book, I suggest that you pick just one, as there is an overlap in the ideas within both books. Personally, I enjoyed 'The Mastery of Love' the most out of the two. Once I got around the language barrier, there were some great ideas about love and relationships that I had never thought of before.
The first of these is that in a romantic relationship, or any relationship for that matter, you will only withstand the amount of abuse you receive from that person that is equal to the amount of abuse you inflict upon yourself. This is because you believe somehow that you are worthy of this abuse. When the abuse you receive (and this can be any form of abuse) is greater than that which you impose upon yourself, that's the tipping point at which you'll leave the relationship. It's messed up, but really speaks to the psychology of humanity. The greater our love for ourselves, the better we treat ourselves and the lower our threshold for abuse or ill treatment.
I guess the moral to that is love yourself, treat yourself with respect and only give yourself the very best. Once you know that you are worthy, you will be better equipped to surround yourself with people who treat you in the same manner.
The second gem I received from this book is that there are two paths in a relationship, love and fear. Those showing love see their relationship as a team sport, they work together and everything is for the benefit of the team. Those trying to control the relationship are doing so out of fear.
I don't think I'll read either of these books again. While there were a few pearls of wisdom, they certainly aren't worth taking up a place on my self. If you are interested in reading them but are uncertain, I would recommend seeing if you can get them as an E Book or audio book first, so that you don't waste extra money and space in your house if, like me, they aren't really your cup of tea.
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